


what's this I hear about no rabbi

by Whumpdeedoo



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Amy is PREGNANT with their SON, F/M, Jewish Jake Peralta, but i have to do everything myself, chag sameach yall, i deserve more jewish jake peralta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:00:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23503510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whumpdeedoo/pseuds/Whumpdeedoo
Summary: "Is it a boy? A girl? No, a Jew!"Jake and Amy discuss their baby's religion.
Relationships: Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago
Comments: 22
Kudos: 110





	what's this I hear about no rabbi

"Hey, Ames?"

Amy hummed from where she sat on the couch, idly paging through her third baby binder. She still couldn't quite believe that after all this time and effort she was finally going to bring their baby into the world.

"What do you think about religion?"

She looked up to where Jake was dawdling awkwardly a few feet away. "What do you mean?"

"Like, for the baby." Even months into Amy's pregnancy, Jake's lips curved into a soft smile at the thought. Their baby.

Amy raised her eyebrows. "Honestly, I hadn't considered it. I mean, it's not like either of us are particularly religious."

"Hm, yeah." He fidgeted in place.

Amy pursed her lips. Putting the binder aside, she patted the couch next to her. Jake complied, plopping down while Amy angled herself to face him. "What's this about, Jake?"

Jake sighed, reaching absentmindedly for her hand. "Nothing, really, I guess, but I was just on the phone with Mom and it got me thinking."

"About?"

"I dunno, like, I hated synagogue as a kid, but the one day a year my mom took off work was Yom Kippur. And my dad isn't Jewish, and he never went even when he was around, so it was this nice thing, like I would have my mom all to myself for the day. I mean, I would sneak gummy bears when I was supposed to be fasting, so-" Jake chuckled, "clearly I was not concerned with the spirit of the holiday, but still.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that growing up, Judaism was one of the only things that made me feel like part of a family."

"Oh, Jake." Amy leaned over and planted a kiss on his cheek. "I'm sorry."

Jake smiled at her and shook his head. "It doesn't matter. Plus, I've got the best family right here." He leaned down to whisper conspiratorially to her bump. "Isn't that right, John?"

Amy rolled her eyes and tamped down on a smile. "We're not naming our son after a Die Hard character."

"Bruce-"

"Or actor."

"I could've been about to say Bruce Wayne. We could name our kid after Batman. Did you even think of that, Amy?"

"Believe it or not, I never thought of naming our firstborn child after Batman."

Jake's answering grin was so endearing Amy had no choice but to pull him in for a brief kiss. Pulling away, she sobered. "So what does this mean? Do you... want to raise the baby Jewish?"

Jake shrugged. "I mean, I figured your family would want him to be Catholic. Go to his confirmation or whatever."

"Yes," Amy replied slowly. "But then wouldn't your family want him to be Jewish?"

"Yup." He tipped his head backward with a groan. "Maybe we should just forget it. I mean, it was enough of a nightmare dealing with them arguing over what type of ceremony we should have."

Amy's mouth twisted into a wry smile. It certainly was. "But we'll still have to have this conversation eventually. Personally, I don't care whether or not our kid is Catholic, we'd still celebrate the holidays with my family, it's just that they'd care."

Jake picked his head up to look at her. "See, I don't really care either, I mean, not about the actual religious stuff, but I do want our kid to be a part of this tradition that keeps my family together. It's not super important to me that he's Jewish, but I don't want him to be not-Jewish, y'know?"

"Yeah." Amy contemplated for a few moments. "We could do neither. Celebrate our respective holidays with our families without officially raising him as one or the other. Or we could let him choose, once he's old enough."

Jake gave her knee a gentle squeeze. "Amy, I love you, but that is a terrible idea."

"What?" Amy said, indignant.

"Let a kid choose whether they'd rather go to Hebrew school or eat a cracker? Pretty sure I know which way that's going to go."

Amy laughed. "Okay, I guess you have a point. But we could still do neither."

"Yeah, that would work." He grinned at her, but it was tight.

"But what?"

Jake bit his lip. "It's just, you're not Jewish, so it doesn't matter how many holidays we celebrate, if he doesn't get bar mitzvahed, he's not technically Jewish. And I don't know why that matters to me, it never has before, but it kind of does."

"Okay." Amy said easily.

"Okay? That's it?" Jake blinked.

"Of course. If it's important to you that our baby's Jewish, then our baby'll be Jewish. It doesn't matter to me."

Jake smiled, genuinely this time, the corners of his eyes crinkling. "I love you, thanks, babe."

"Love you too. And you'll be the one to break the news to my family." She grinned wickedly. "Plus, Judaism's the only culture you've got to pass on to him, white boy."

Jake cackled. "Is it a boy? A girl? No, a Jew!"

Amy leaned her head against his shoulder with laughter. "AJAB, assigned Jew at birth," she got out between laughter.

"That's called circumcision, babe." The pair burst into giggles again.

"I do like Jewish names," Amy said, once they had gotten ahold of themselves. "Elijah, Isaac…"

"David?" Jake suggested smugly.

"Absolutely not."

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I'm alive! And writing this random non-whump ficlet instead of the prompts that have been sitting in my inbox for over a year haha....   
> This is just a little thing that sprung into my mind just in time for Passover! I actually love Elijah for the baby, though. Elijah Santiago-Peralta. Has a nice ring to it!  
> You can find me on tumblr @whumpdeedoo


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